Vice Almost Wakes Up


Ambidextrous Haiku

Turn on the Black Right.

Intensify that white rift

to get the right lift . . .

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Covington Catholic Limericks

https://tribwgntv.files.wordpress.com/2018/06/maga-hat.jpg?quality=85&strip=all

Black Israelite haters, excused,
led to schoolboys reviled and accused
of white racism, hate.
The reaction was great–
but the whiteboys were merely amused.

Progressives were driven berserk
by a teenager’s innocent smirk.
The old shaman tried shaming:
and drumming and blaming,
but none of those strategies work!

Mr. Phillips, the activist drummer
gave Regressives their Indian Summer–
till a teenager’s smirk
drove the demons berserk
and made dumbed-down regressives much dumber.

If a smile is a cultural crime
then the criminals need to do time.
Every whiteboy must go
in this cracka-ass show
and I’m guilty for reason of rhyme.

Raking the Golden Muck

Wait a minute . . . Deep State Trump-haters are STILL talking about that Steele Dossier? Still trying to digest that nothingburger 2 years later? Hmmmmmm . . .
It is time, oh my seething, teeming hordes of loyal readers, to re-inflict one of my epic poems on all of you. Time has improved its delicate Trumpian savor.

Here is my Golden Shower Oldie from 2017:

 

Fake News Wets Bed

HEAR YE, HEAR YE:  It’s a wedding bell for bedding well while we’re crushin’ the illusion of Russian collusion! CNN wets on Russian bedding but Trump bets on Russian wedding, and you’re invited to the bridal shower. Punking the monkery, dig the debunkery; from Rasputin to Putin it’s time for some straight shootin’. Hillary looks old and glowers at Donald’s rumored golden showers. Our media owes US an explanation for streams of steaming urination, but we are willing to forgive and use their wet diapers as debt wipers. My poem’s appeal may take a toll, but let its little peal now roll:

“Tinkle, tinkle” rings the bell
A Fake News warning; time to spell
out what was wet with Moscow girls.
Putin’s putas?  Wisdom’s pearls
were pried from Truth’s reluctant shell,
banishing Hillary straight to hell.
None. It’s what we want left over
from this hag. We now discover
beds were dry; it all amounted
(all those golden tricks recounted)
to less than a tepid bowl of kasha. . .
Russia laughed from her summer dacha.
InfoWars was on it first
while Dems spun lies from false to worst,
awarding cash for faked dossiers
embellished with the CIA’s
well-trained performing circus-seal.
The FBI endorsed the deal
as RINOS horned in on the action:
Washingtonian distraction;
a democrat-concocted fuss—

. . . but we ALL paid Hillary to piss on us.